Episode Eight: Unicorns
John Lanchester
I’m having trouble suspending my disbelief at the Labour manifesto. The party promises that it will:
Cut the deficit every year
Raise the state pension by whichever is the highest of inflation, average earnings or 2.5 per cent
Protect spending on health, education and foreign aid
Hire an additional 8000 GPs, 20,000 nurses and 3000 midwives
‘Guarantee people a GP appointment within 48 hours, and on the same day for those who need it’
Reduce tuition fees
Not raise basic or higher rate income tax, or VAT, or National Insurance
Give every child a free unicorn
Make rich people, tax avoiders and non-doms pay for it all
I made up one of those promises. If you’re trying to guess which is fictional, here’s a clue: not the most unlikely.
Comments
Anything about economic growth in there? As I understood it Labour's secret weapon was going to be a quiet return to Keynes, on the basis that five years of X% of Y will pay for an awful lot more if Y is larger every year. Shame if they're keeping it so quiet they're not going to tell anyone.
But "we can't afford decent services" is and always has been a Tory line, adopted for public consumption to justify an ideologically-driven attack on the public sector. The question isn't whether it's possible for Labour to deliver, it's whether they will the means.
Also, how much would the defense budget have to be cut in order to fund the health-care hiring expansion and the reduction of tuition? If it can be done, it should be done, though it would violate phony pieties that cluster around the holiest of holies ("national security", of course) like flies on dung.